At
Winter Camp (the four day camp sponsored by the campus ministry, FOCUS) they
read an anonymous letter to the church. You can find it here:
Please read this letter. It’s exceptionally well put and
says everything in an amazing way.
I mention this letter because it brought me back to a time
where I intimately knew that enemy named, Depression. Sure, I had something
medically wrong with me that caused me to plunge to this low, but it didn’t
lessen its effects.
I’ve had my brush with suicidal thoughts, nothing serious,
but during that time in my life, I had no desire to live. Like this person said
in their letter, it isn’t about death being appealing, but life was agonizing.
When I went through this terrible time, I tried confiding
in a fellow friend. I don’t want to name names or even give a gender because I
don’t want to call them out, but I think my story needs to be written.
This friend was in the church with me and I felt like they
brushed off my troubles once I’d revealed them. I felt so betrayed. This
person, who called themself a follower of Christ just seemed to act like my
life falling apart wasn’t the hugest deal.
Maybe they just didn’t know how to comfort me. Maybe I
failed in revealing the severity of my plight. I won’t say that they are a terrible
person by how they handled the situation, but they didn’t handle it right.
Naturally, I am a person who struggles with revealing too
much of myself to people. I once had such a close friend and circumstances
dictated the slow death of that friendship. The pain of that loss forever
changed me to be this person that hesitates before bearing my heart.
I’ve grown so much in this area, but when I tried letting
someone into the pain in my world, they just made me want to shut down and I
did. That person made me isolate myself in the time that I needed the most
support.
I was crushed that this follower of Christ could do what
they did.
So, I write all this because the church needs to be
careful of their actions. They need to do what this letter says and do more
than just hand out meaningless platitudes. They need to accept others' burdens
if that person deems them worthy of such an important position and they need to
not brush it off or give unwanted advice.
If you haven’t been through the war that depression
brings, then shut your mouth and just listen to those of us who need you to be
there for us in these hard times. You will only alienate those in need if you
act on your pride or ignorance and try to tell us anything. Just give us a
shoulder for our hardship.
I may sound harsh, but I can’t stress any of this enough.
During my time of deep depression, I couldn’t stand to be involved in the Body because
of this one person. My faith suffered and I felt so close to giving it all up.
Don’t be the person that hurts those already at the brink
of ending their suffering. Be the person who reached their hand out to save
those from the edge of the plunge.
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